Wedding salami: how much to give, the envelope, and sending it from abroad
What wedding salami is, who gives it and at which event, how families decide the amount, how to present it in an envelope with a card, and how to give it when you live abroad.
Wedding salami is the cash gift given to the bride and groom at a Pakistani wedding, usually in an envelope with the giver's name on it. Close family give the most, and the amount depends on how close you are and on what your family usually gives. If you can't be there, the usual way is to send the money to a family member who gives the envelope on your behalf, with a card or a small gift from you so the couple has something to keep.
Here's how it works, and how to get it right from the other side of the world.
What salami means
"Salami" is the word for a cash gift given as a blessing. At a wedding it's given to the couple; at Eid, the same word is used for the money elders give children (also called Eidi). Wedding salami helps the couple start their life together, and in many families a careful record is kept of who gave what, so the gift can be returned in kind at the giver's own family weddings.
Who gives, and at which event
A Pakistani wedding is several events, and families differ on when salami is given:
- At the baraat or the nikah, many guests hand their envelope to the groom or the bride on the stage, or to a parent.
- At the walima, guests from the groom's side often give their salami.
- Close family sometimes give theirs privately, before or after the events, rather than on the stage.
If you're not sure, ask a parent or an older sibling which event your family gives at. It's a normal question.
How much to give
There's no fixed amount, and no guide can tell you the "right" number for your family. What decides it:
- How close you are. Parents, siblings and grandparents give the most; cousins and family friends less; colleagues and acquaintances a smaller, standard amount.
- What your family usually gives. Families tend to keep to a level that's known on both sides. A parent or older sibling will know it.
- What was given to you. If the couple's family gave at your own wedding, many people give at least the same.
- Whether you're also giving a gift. A large gift for the couple's home can sit beside a smaller cash amount.
Some families like an amount ending in one, such as 1,100 or 5,100, as a sign of blessing; others don't mind. Follow your own family's habit.
The envelope and the card
How salami is presented matters almost as much as the amount.
- Use a proper envelope, not loose notes. Wedding salami envelopes are sold everywhere in Pakistan, often decorated with "Shaadi Mubarak".
- New, crisp notes are a nice touch: families often collect fresh notes from the bank before a wedding.
- Write your name clearly on the envelope, with your family name. After the wedding the couple will open dozens of envelopes, and they'll want to know which was yours.
- Add a few lines in your own words. A short dua or wish on a card makes cash feel personal. Our gift card messages in English and Urdu can help.
Giving salami when you live abroad
If you can't attend, you can still give your salami properly:
- Choose someone to give it for you: a parent, sibling or cousin who will be at the wedding.
- Send them the money early, at least a week before. Transfers from abroad can take a day or two, and the days before a wedding are hectic.
- Ask them to put it in an envelope with your name, and to give it at the event your family gives at.
- Send something of your own as well, so the couple has more than an envelope from you: a hand-written card, flowers for the mehndi, or a gift for their new home.
- Call the couple the day before, or the morning after the walima, not in the middle of an event.
Pair it with a gift
Cash gets spent; a gift stays. Many people abroad send their salami through family and a gift with a card directly to the couple. Ideas for the couple, the family and the events are in our guide to wedding gifts to send to Pakistan, and a free Shaadi Mubarak e-card lets you send a message on the day itself.
We deliver gifts anywhere in Pakistan, with your words hand-written on the card. Tell us about the couple and your budget on WhatsApp, and we'll agree the gift, the price and the delivery date with you before you pay.